The Secret to Building up Your Dating Confidence

confidence dating life learnings personal empowerment relationships romance Dec 10, 2021
Woman smiling looking into computer

Maybe you’re confident in most situations, but dating makes you nervous. Some jitters are natural when you’re wondering if someone will like you, and hoping to develop a meaningful relationship. On the other hand, you may need to become more assured if you want a happy love life.

Confidence is actually more important than good looks when it comes to attracting potential romantic partners, according to some studies. Singles that smile and make eye contact are approached more often.

Now that you don’t have to worry about looking like a supermodel, you can focus on building up your dating confidence. Try these ideas for managing doubts and appearing sure of yourself.


How to Manage Your Doubts about Dating

  1. Let go of expectations. Do you spend a first date dreaming about finding your soul mate or dismissing anyone who doesn’t completely match your detailed checklist? Real relationships require patience and flexibility.
  2. Accept your fears. Trying to resist or deny your doubts wastes energy and makes your anxiety stronger. Instead, lovingly acknowledge your feelings and remember that you can still choose how you want to act.
  3. Focus on others. Keep in mind your date is probably nervous too. If you work at putting them at ease, you’ll probably loosen up too.
  4. Think positive. Look at what you have to gain. Even if you’re not romantically compatible, you might share a laugh and some interesting stories.
  5. Stay busy. Do you analyze your date afterwards, looking for an excuse to reject others or discover your own missteps? Shift your attention to something more constructive like reading a book or baking bread.
  6. Love yourself. Celebrate your strengths and know that you are worthy just as you are. When you feel special, you’ll have more to contribute to any relationship.

Many of these suggestions may appear too simple. The suggestions mentioned above, indeed, are crucial for developing any type of positive relationship- at work, in one's family, and in romance! Now, let's take a look at dating, specifically. 


How to Appear Confident While Dating

  1.  However you feel inside, a smile will make you more approachable and lower your stress. Plus, smiling makes you look more attractive.
  2. Dress up. Wear something you know is flattering. It will help you take your mind off your appearance.
  3. Adjust your posture. Your body language talks before you can even open your mouth. Check that your back is straight and your shoulders are down. You’ll look slimmer and more energetic.
  4. Make eye contact. Let your date see you’re interested in them by meeting their gaze. Your eyes can express your warmth and sincerity.
  5. Touch is powerful. If appropriate and just meeting someone from an online dating app, reach out and shake hands. If you’re hitting it off, a light touch on the arm can be very encouraging.
  6. Prepare your remarks. Be ready to keep the conversation flowing. Rehearse a few intriguing questions you want to ask. Research a topic or two like a recent news story or some background information on a memorable film you just saw.
  7. Choose the activity. While taking your date’s interests into consideration, see if you can suggest a venue where you’ll feel at home. If you’re lucky, they’ll want to browse around a farmer’s market or rent a kayak too.
  8. Keep practicing. The more you date, the more confident you’ll be in your ability to meet other singles, make a positive impression, and explore opportunities to develop a loving and caring relationship. You’ll also be clarifying your short list for what you really need in a romantic partner.

Be friendly, take risks, and learn from each dating experience. When you relax and radiate confidence, you and your date can both have fun while you look for the love that you deserve. 



Enjoying the blog? Check out the Voyager's Club Inner Circle to find others who are also interested in similar topics, meeting monthly, and working to live their magic. 

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